Posts

If Roxy Had Pooped 15 Seconds Later, We’d Both Be Dead Now

car-thieves-jimonlight-9

You will never believe what just happened.  As I am posting this, maybe 20 minutes has elapsed since the entire thing went down.  It’s 5:56pm EST.

Roxy and I were doing her afternoon walk; she poops, and we head towards the elevator. As soon as we get off of the elevator, we hear a screech, an explosion, and see a Ford Mustang flip horizontally in the air and slam into the tree you see below in the photos.  A black male jumps out of the car and runs away down the highway right by our neighborhood.  One of my neighbors runs after this man and grabs him swimming away in the canal by the apartment complex.  The driver of the car, also a black male, also jumps out of the car but is detained by the cop who was chasing this pair in a 25 mph zone and one of my other neighbors who was helping hold the offender down on the ground.  The cop runs after the first runner, but returns after he sees him jump into the canal.

If Roxy had decided to have her constitutional 15 seconds later than she did, both of us would be dead.  D-E-A-D.  The car left the roadway and hit the grass causing them to tailspin across both lanes of the neighborhood road RIGHT where she took her shit.  I was interviewed by the police who told me that these guys stole a purse and an iPad from a Publix down the street, and were being chased.  The officer believed the car was also part of the theft.

What the hell is wrong with people?!  I hope the driver enjoyed his f*cking concrete burns, there were kids playing on the other side of the street where the car impacted the tree.  THERE WERE KIDS PLAYING.  THIS IS A NEIGHBORHOOD.

F*cking criminal bastards.